I seriously need a vacation

I don't believe I have ever, ever felt the need to leave, to be alone, by myself so strongly before. I really, really need some time alone. Get my drift...alone. Frankly, I don't think it would even have to be a deserted island in the sun, I would settle for a quiet hotel room in Spokane. Though the island in the sun is appealing.

To break it down, my Mom's hospitalization last summer and my Dad moving in with us was the beginning. I used my vacation time to travel to Missoula every opportunity I had. Then, I had managed to save some time for Christmas. The plan was that we would visit our families and then come home and spend some quality "together" time skiing, sledding, playing games and perhaps drinking cocoa. But, Dad got sick at Christmas time and we spent all of our time in Dillon or Missoula where he underwent a cardiac procedure. So, all my time was shot. Not that I regret spending the time I did with my family. I don't. Not at all. I love them.

To add to the stress, T has been gone alot. No. Let me correct....all the time. In the beginning he promised that he would only travel one week a month and that it would be from Monday to Friday. I don't believe that ever happened. It was always more than that. This month he will have been gone a total of three weeks. This puts alot of pressure on me as I have the Empress and a demanding job to contend with. Since she is in a special daycare I have to have a babysitter pick her up after daycare closes and take her home and watch her while I am at work. Any time I miss, I have to make up on the weekend.

And, we just finished moving our offices. Meaning that there is a great deal of unrest due to the upheaval. Presently we are just beginning to get things back to some normalcy.

I guess I am just tired. T is able to get away and take a break by traveling. I need a short sabatical. I adore the Empress and would miss her every moment I was gone, but I think a vacation, at this point, would make me a better mommy. I find myself snapping at her all the time. When T is home I am snapping at him as well. That part I understand a little better as I get pretty used to being home alone and when he is home for those fleeting days, it is like he is invading my space. Or, in the very least messing it up.

So I am thinking a weekend away?? That is not too much to ask, right? We could call it regrouping. I just need to regroup.